caesar trumps pregnant chocolate solstice donut and parading cupid

Summer has arrived! The unofficial arrival occurred a few days ago when the mid-day temperature hit 95 ℉ (35℃) at the same time a large wildfires broke out in the canyons north of the city. Official arrival was marked by the summer solstice on June 20th when the ..

“Rotational axis of the planet is most inclined relative to the sun,” I ‘explained’.

“I thought it was the longest day of the year,” Nazy replied.

“That too,” I replied. “
In the Northern Hemisphere.” I thought.

“Nothing about axes?”

“Axis.”

“That’s what I said.”

“And this year, there was a full moon on the same day as the solstice.” I replied. “
It’s somewhat rare and ominous given Melika’s plans and state,” I thought, making a mental note to expand on my concerns later in this letter.

There has been good news on the (local) fire front. The fire is now 93% contained. But, responding to a question that Darius asked (“What does ‘contained’ mean and how do they compute it?&rdquoWinking, I’ve discovered that ..

“They guess!” I explained.

“Guess?!” Nazy queried.

“Yes, ‘guess’ is the best word to describe the consolidated explanations that populate the Internet, my dear. At Georgia Tech, we used a far more descriptive term..”

“Yes?”

“Engineers say: I pulled the answer out of my…”

“That’s enough, Dan.” Nazy concluded.

Local TV news ….

Good news. With the fire 93% contained, the acreage burned has decreased from 8230 to 7620.”


… has convinced me that tallies listing the amount of acreage burned are also guesses.
“How can they ‘unburn’ about 600 acres?” Nazy asked reasonably.

“I don’t know, but if that’s possible, maybe it’s possible to undo Republican Presidential primary results.”

dan and Tiger Ceasar Solstice June 2016


As an aside, while the local, Sherpa fire is ‘contained’ (whatever that means), other fires in the Los Angeles area continue to grow. I’m really annoyed at the wretched performance of the ‘rainy season El Niño’.

Here in Santa Barbara, the Summer Solstice is celebrated with the annual Summer Solstice parade. Until last year, we marked the event by strolling downtown to watch. Things changed last year when Melika, Tom and their friends decided to take part in the parade. The tradition continued this year.

It was a typical Tom, Melika and friends project. Friends were mobilized, reserves were called up, budgets were busted and results were awesome. Last year’s theme had something to do with outer space; this year …

“ … something about
legends,” Nazy claimed. “We’re going to be Greek gods.”

“Reminds me of college,” I said,

“You weren’t the fraternity type,” Nazy replied.

“I’ll be going as Julius Caesar,” I replied, ignoring Nazy’s comment.

“He was Roman.”

“He was a
legend, Nazy. Is Tom going as Elvis?”

The plan, however, called for Tom to be Zeus, Melika was Aphrodite, and Tiger would be..

“Cupid,” Melika
❤️explained.

mel and Melika at parade JUne 2016

Have we asked for his opinion?” I thought.

“I’ve got an arrow with a heart, cute wings and a bow to go with his costume.”

While Tiger mulled this over, Nazy was drafted to help with the costumes. She contracted with the local seamstress and glued feathers onto ancient Greek military hats. While this was happening..

“Tiger got pink
eye,” Melika told us. Luckily, his fever broke and the antibiotics took hold in time for the parade. Things looked to be under control until I let him…

“… pick whichever donut you want,” I said at the parade assembly point. He chose one with a pile of chocolate cream and he didn’t eat it, because..

“I want to lick the chocolate,” Tiger informed us.

The chocolate smeared all over his white cupid outfit and when I tried to replace it with a (white) powdered sugar donut, he responded with the clear, forthright opposition that can be expected from a two year old. Melika intervened by breaking off a small part of the chocolate donut — an idea that did not receive toddler endorsement. We carried him to his ‘ride’, but he was fixated on the broken do nut. He agreed to sit down on the wagon, but only if he could watch “Wheels on the Bus” on Melika’s iPhone. While that worked, Nazy slipped Tiger’s Cupid wings in place. A few minutes later Tiger noticed.

I look like a Victoria’s Secret model,” Tiger thought, unaware of how the rest of his costume looked. He responded with thoughtful, unfeathered, opposition marked by refusal to sit in his chariot. I began carrying him along the parade route. Although I was getting weary, Melika was forging on.

“She’s eight and a half months pregnant,” I reminded Nazy. “And she’s walking along a parade route in heels.”

“She’s a trooper.”

“It’s a full moon, Nazy,” I interjected. “Tiger was born under a full moon. Isn’t this pushing things?”

“For business reasons, Dan, she can’t have the baby until July 5 or later. It will be fine.”

Has anyone spoken with the oncoming baby?” I thought.

“Melika is a very determined young lady,” Nazy concluded.

Determined or not, Melika took a nap after the parade and before the celebratory party. Tiger, who, having been carried, should not have been tired, also took a nap. (Eventually.)
Solstice parade float

And, finally, in the UK, voters decided to leave the European Union. As a result, the pound crashed. More personally, the Swiss Franc crashed. Naturally, a portion of my pension was impacted negatively. But..

“Don’t worry, Nazy,” I observed, “there is a solution. If the US dollar collapses, our pension will be restored.”

“How likely is that?”

“It happened the last time the Republicans were in the White House. And if Trump is elected, the currency markets will surely react to that cosmic blunder. Maybe we should vote for him.”

“Dan!” Nazy replied. Appalled.

“Don’t worry, my dear, I’m not that desperate. I’m willing to take one for the country.”

For last week's letter, please click here


Zeus, Aphrodite, Caesar and Cupid

Tom, Melika, Dan, tiger Solstice 2016

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