The sun in the middle of solstice parades as Leandra sleeps

Welcome to summer! Here in Santa Barbara, we celebrated by watching the annual Solstice Parade.

Watched?” a curious reader asks. “I thought you marched?”

Indeed, the last two years we did march — as part of a gargantuan troupe of Melika and Tom’s friends. But, last year it was almost 100℉, Melika was 8+ months pr
egnant and Tiger was miffed because we wouldn’t let him eat all the donuts. A random costumed denizen followed the group to Mark and Andreana’s home for the after parade party. Nazy, Tiger, Melika and I bailed out of the parade about ¾ of the way. These events may be associated with the decision to take a break (i.e. watch rather than walk).

Solstice Parade snippet
(Note: Each person has a half black/half white costume.)

solstice parade 1


In Santa Barbara, watchers need to be alert fro cascarones — confetti filled eggs. As you can see from the photo below, young Tiger wasn’t paying attention. It’s an exciting time for Tiger. He has graduated from group swimming lessons and is now doing private lessons.

The private swimming lessons mark the end of an era. I’ve been taking Tiger swimming for 2½ years. His confidence and ability has grown over time — although I have to keep a very close eye on him. (His ability has not grown as quickly as his confidence.)

As I began this week’s edition of The Weekly Letter, Microsoft Word, which I’ve been using for years, responded with the petulance I normally associate with a two-year old.

Tiger for TWL

Activate?” I said to myself (and to Word). “You are activated.”

Exhibiting the rash optimism that should have been extinguished by years of experience with technology, I followed the on-screen instructions — entering my username/password combination. The application, astonished by my bravery, froze. I tried Microsoft on-line help and was immediately connected to a non-responsive, βeta version of an artificially ‘intelligent’ virtual assistant. I paused to reflect (and mumble a few obscenities.)

Mumble?” Nazy interrupts.

“Maybe a (rather) loud and off-color
mumble.” I reply.

A few hours later, I tried again. Somehow I bypassed the hapless virtual assistant. Microsoft immediately recognized me and sent me directly to an agent ..

“This is
not about a Nokia phone.” I replied patiently.

“The only device associated with this username is a yellow Nokia
telephone. Bought in Europe,” he added.

“Argh.” I replied, hanging up. “
It was a kind of cool telephone,” I thought. “Great camera. Unfortunately, though, no apps and no way to access my music library. It was also last used two years ago.

This Nokia experience jogged my memory. When I had tried to buy Microsoft’s Office Suite, I had been unable because Microsoft refused to believe that I lived in the USA. My workaround had been to use Nazy’s username/password. With that useful information, I established a chat session that eventually concluded in a fix. And..

“More importantly, Nazy, it was fixed without any need for me to spend any money.”

“What did they do?”

“Who knows? Something about their license server.”

Later, Nazy and I took Tiger to MOXI, the local children’s museum this week. He really, really likes the museum.

Tiger and Nazy at MOXI
tiger and nazy at light board july 1 2017


He’s also interested in dinosaurs and the stars. When we were taking him to his home, he pointed to Jupiter.

“Is that the biggest planet, Dan?” He asked.

“The biggest one near us,” I replied.

“The stars are very far away, Dan.”

“I know.”

“But the sun is a star.”

“It is indeed. But it’s dark now. Where is the sun?”

“It’s in the middle, Dan.” Tiger replied.

“In the middle of what?”

“The sun is in the middle of all the planets, Dan.”

We should have named you Copernicus,” I thought.

Meanwhile, in Lebanon, it’s been reported that young Leandra ..

dan at moxi

“Slept for more than 4 hours.” Darius proclaimed.

“In a row?” I asked.

“Yes.”

“Without waking up?”

“Of course.”

“Wow. How much more than four hours?”

“A little more, Dad.”

“Great!” I replied. “
Four hours and 43 seconds,” I thought.

Passing time on Facebook, I noticed that one of my acquaintances thanked the
current President for “restoring dignity to the office.”

It is, of course, grammatically, syntactically and semantically impossible to create a sentence that contains both of the words ‘Trump’ and ‘dignity’.” I thought. “He is a petty and insecure being devoid of Presidential accomplishment.”

“He’s a hypocrite,” Nazy asserted.

“Not really, my dear. A hypocrite has values that he fails to follow. This guy has only one value: ‘Do what’s best for
Donald Trumo’ — and he always does.”
tiger and Nazy july 1 2017

“But he doesn’t care about Russian meddling.”

“That’s because the meddling helped
him. What do you think we’d hear from him if the Russians had meddled to help Hilary and she’d won as a result? Do you think the Dumpster, eh, the Trumpster would ignore that?”

And, finally, we borrowed Melika’s car this weekend. We were heading to the outlet shopping malls in Camarillo, California. Our two door sporty car wouldn’t have enough space to handle Nazy’s selections.

“Don’t exaggerate, Dan.” Nazy interrupts.

“I’m not..”

“Our car has two seats for children. Those take up a lot of space.”

Melika’s car, nicknamed ‘The Escaladeasurus’, was up to the task.

For last week's letter, click here

Dan and Tiger
MOXI water exhibit

dan and tiger July 1 2017 MOXI

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