sneaky chipmunks deal with rocking horse wagons and sideless cribs
Do Santa Barbara chipmunks have bushy black tails? (Or was the home invader a baby skunk?) Why was the family pterodactyl pulling a little red wagon? What should be done with Darius’ third grade paint-by-numbers coloring book? Is Tiger’s appraisal of Arrow’s skill set (‘he can only cry, poop, eat and sleep&rsquo accurate? And what crib structures do Baby Melika and two year old Tiger have in common? Finally, read about the Arrow welcome poem and paintings prepared by Mitra and Nazy.
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I am asking you to have a baby, Melika. It’s been 9 Months
Why was Melika still pregnant after her due date passed? Or, as Tiger put it: “I am asking you, Mama, to have that baby.” Was monster (the cat) the only phlegmatic member of the waiting family? What comes to mind when the doctor says “… water broke…”? (For me, the vision included water balloons and balconies.) Did Melika (finally) take action after realizing that without movement, there would be a dearth of weekly letter material? Did the family pull together to deliver this baby or was it mainly Melika's pushing? Read More...
Full Moon sailing in a dark and rainy party habitat
Was a sailing instructor really willing to entrust a boat to Dan for a ‘solo’? (How did he hedge his bets?) How is a home renovation project like child birth? And why did I think of that analogy? And who, in addition to Mitra and Stefan, loves to dance? Hint: see the intro photo. How well can children remember events from the distant past? I’m talking about the Grand(est)son and ‘rain’ and the first daughter and … well, you have to read about it here. Read More...
stuff replicator swims In deficit stressed renovation
Did Dan actually manage an on-budget kitchen renovation project? (And why didn’t he learn anything from that success?) Who hid a ‘stuff-replicator’ in Dan and Nazy’s stuff? How do we know that it’s there? Did the replicator hide replicants of itself in Melika’s house? Why is silence the secret to a successful negotiation? And, finally how is the grand(est)son doing with his swimming? Read More...
Burning Man invites nature indoors as RV morphs to U-Haul
Why is Melika no Fan of the Burning Man Plan? Burning Man: a chance to commune with nature — but what is you want nature to stay outside? Is really living off the land if you can’t get ‘the land’ off of you? (Is it fair to refer to ‘dust’ as ‘nature’?) Why was the cat miffed by a power failure? And a U-Haul? What’s that all about? Read More...
Swimming, dancing, walking tiger babbles epithets at Skype
Can Skype bring a baby to tears? What does Dan have in common with the graduation speaker at the American University of Beirut? The grand(est)son’s dancing genes are shared by Mitra, but where did he get his babbling genes? Who gets his comeuppance - and why? And, didn’t someone, a grand(est) someone have a birthday party? Read More...
percussion! talent! renovation & budget: tornado & Trailer park
How did the Grand(est)son’s first music class work out? Hint: He like percussion. And, he’s big on cool sunglasses. Where are the music genes in the family: Mitra (Tango)? Darius (Bassoon)? Tom (Elvis)? Why does Dan (still) get shivers, panic attacks and uncontrollable laughter when someone mentions renovation and budget in the same sentence. And what does that have to do with his SAT (verbal) tests?
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Melika birthday colors crash eucalyptus branch and salmon
Why did Melika push Ronnie off of the swing? (And how old was she when she did it?) What do Santa Barbara, San Diego, New Orleans and Miami have in common. (Hint: It’s not a Nittany Lion.) Can a 100 foot high Eucalyptus Tree mimic an earthquake? Will the local ecology police fine Dan for harboring undocumented flora? Finally, can Dan see with his new eyes and new color-correcting sunglasses? Read More...
early evening dino-Rooster Drives New car Mistake
Where can you find a teak rooster that is the same size as a Tyrannosaurs Rex? (And why would you be looking for one?) Why didn’t High School experiences (“Don’t let me friends see me in ‘the VAN’, Dad.&rdquo influence Melika’s selection of a new motor conveyance? And, on the topic of cars, did Dan and Nazy really down-size while the grand(est)son is upsizing? Why does the government want you to believe that they create an extra hour when they move to daylight savings time?
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Full moon lion king welcome for grandest baby Ever
How can Dan, who ‘guaranteed’ a May girl, maintain his predictive accuracy in the face of a June boy? What was the lion doing at cottage hospital on June 13, 2014? How big is the “T&M Costumes” truck? When will the new arrival outweigh the cat? And why is Dan so good with babies? Read More...
Friday the 13th Full moon accelerates Baby ArrivaL
Don’t want to read another issue themed: “When is this baby going to arrive?” Well, this week’s edition will meet your needs. What did gravity, the full moon, Friday the 13th, the coming summer solstice and, oh yeah, Melika have to do with the birth of the first Martin (and Adams) grandchild? Was it a boy or a girl? And, who would go orchid hunting in the midst of all this activity? All is revealed in this issue of The Weekly Letter. Read More...
Father’s Day baby and alcohol-free Persian Bar chalk wins
Who put the gopher snake in Melika’s driveway? (And who knew that a gopher snake could be five feet long?) Does it sound strange to hear: “Darius is safe and sound back in Beirut.”? (Does anybody know how to punctuate the previous sentence?) Why does Apple sponsor chalk paintings on asphalt during May? Where do we find ingenuity need to tackle idiot-proof construction projects? And, what makes a baby that is “perfectly happy where it is” decide that it is time to be born? Hint: The grandfather’s bet in the delivery date poll was insufficient incentive?) The photo is here because Nazy really likes that hat. Read More...
Dr. Seuss Writes Troll Stories on Dan’s Typewriter
Did Melika’s obstetrician formerly handle scheduling for United Airlines? Why does Dan believe that the TSA outsourced work to Malaysia? Who recused The Martin Family troll (and cabbage patch) collection? Did you know that Mark Twain was the first person to write a book on a typewriter? (Or, if you’re younger, do you know what a typewriter is.. eh, was?) Why does Dan believe that his typewriter’s age is Jurassic?
Read More...Beer Pong Baby Shower and birthing video cancelled By United
Want to learn more about Melika’s experiences and preparation for the coming grandchild? Do you know the rules that govern a beer pong tournament? (Should these rules be adjusted if the tournament takes place during a baby shower?) Is your prescription medication insurance better than Dan’s? Why would anybody book United Airlines via Denver? Read More...
Albert Schweitzer’s (wet) Olympic Tax-sheltered Crib
Why did Albert Schweitzer call Dan a ‘truly wise person’? Will Dan’s Olympic plans impress the tax authorities? Can Nazy win gold in speed painting? Why does Melika need an indestructible crib? (Hint: Someone destroyed The Martin Family crib.) Will California showers bring flowers or mud? Did the computerized weather model actually work? Read More...
sonar baby and dolphin trumps cosmic Microwave Background
Can you see migrating dolphins from the Pacific Coastal Highway? Can Melika find a human and practical use for cetacean echolocation on ‘hump’ day? What does the cosmic microwave background (CMB) and Dan’s colorblindness test have to do with Melika’s pregnancy? And can anyone surf near a waveless beach? Read More...
Pretty girls tempt great tenors hiking up pregnant hills
Would you rather be “great” or “grand”? How about “wonderful” - like the Wizard of Oz? How can Darius benefit from being one of only 4 tenors in Lebanon? Why does Dan want to change his name to Noah? (Hint: It has something to do with the ice-maker.) And did Dan and Nazy actually witness an escape from San Quentin? Read More...
Visualized Grandparents with 24-hour Electricity
Did Mitra’s ‘California Visualization’ cause Dan’s trouble-free cross-continent flight experience? Was Dan (gasp!) wrong to doubt the approach? Why do the ‘locals’ think that Darius directs US foreign policy decisions? And can Darius be happy in a new apartment that has 24 hour electricity? What life-form fails to understand the meaning of a hissing cat? And.. what is the ‘small challenge’ about Tom and Melika’s marriage celebration? Read More...
Wedding poems precipitate Waffling pumpkins
Do adult offspring ever listen to even more adult parents? Do you want them to listen? (Do diapers have anything to do with subject?) Can an itinerant poet cope with weird atmospherics and Dan’s repartee? Where do they create orange Mount Rushmore’s? And waffles make an appearance.
Read More...Holiday Greetings
Dan brings his corporate experience (downsizing) into the family arena. Can expense reduction, outsourcing, consolidation and relocation make family relocation easier? Why are bubbles featured in The Martin Family Christmas photo? How does Dan weave a Saturn V and a sinking, sticker bedecked, container ship into the review of last year? Read More...
Work Life Balance with purple tomatoes
Who is the pot and who is the kettle? In the field of work-life balance, is it better to work on spreadsheets at 3:00AM, to prepare codicils and appendices at 3:00AM or dance at 3:00AM? Can Dan still hit an 80MPH curveball? (Could Dan ever hit an 80MPH curveball?). Who would buy a purple tomato? Read More...
Varnished Wine presages Engagement Drama
Can Dan prove that Amy the Amaryllis was reincarnated in June? Is it wise to order a Burgundy wine in the Burgundy region of France? (If you think it’s a good idea, please send confirmation to my spouse: nazmartin@hotmail.com.) Is it true that the father always knows what will happen - first?
The photo was taken in Darcy Park in Dijon. Read More...
Clam-digger spectacles and laser dummies
In the trousers category: are polka dots more powerful than clam diggers? Is “it’s a little better” a ringing endorsement for Dan’s new website? Is there a military laser strong enough to correct 20-50,000 vision?
Read More...€uro-less and luggage-less inside the beltway
Traveling again, why did Dan choose US Air? What do America’s Presidential candidates have to do with a Swiss Court ruling about nude hiking? Who would think that a Lebanese ATM card would work in Germany? Read More...
Syrian Insight in mud
Can Mitra’s broken Insight help Darius prepare a last-minute lecture series about the Syrian economy? How will Melika’s sprint through the Muddy Malibu Obstacle Course increase the family IQ? Read More...