Full moon lion king welcome for grandest baby Ever
“Dan!” Nazy interjects. “You predicted a girl.”
“Nazy, my dear, the nominees for first Martin Family grandchild were: ‘Boy’ and ‘Girl’. You cannot blame me if the envelope - sealed in a jar of Hellman’s mayonnaise and locked in the safe at ..”
“So you were wrong about the sex?”
“Perhaps my prediction was slightly awry..”
“And didn’t you predict a May 31st arrival?”
“Nazy! Nazy! Nazy! if you get yourself all ensnared in details, you will miss the big picture: I eventually predicted a full moon delivery.”
“So: if you keep predicting, you’ll eventually be right.”
“I did research, Nazy. My father was born under a full moon (September 24, 1923). Melika was born on a new(isn) moon..”
“Isn’t a new moon the exact opposite of a full moon?”
“For gravitational purposes, the Sun, the Earth and the Moon are all in a line on both new and full moons. So, my point is made.”
“Your point may be made, but you’ve lost the plot - and the bet.
While we were awaiting news about the birth, we kept getting text messages from Tom. He was very proud of Melika: “your daughter is a rock star”. We didn’t know that Tom meant that praise literally. A very short time after a natural..
“When Dan says ‘natural’ in relation to ‘birth’,” Nazy interrupts, “he means ‘painful’. In this case with the modifier ‘very’.”
Correction: A very short time after a very natural childbirth, Melika and Tom filmed a music video birth announcement (http://youtu.be/0-dZR_fdnfg) based on The Lion King. I can’t say I was completely surprised, knowing Melika and Tom, I had not expected a simple email announcement:
From: Melika and Tom
To: Friends
Subject: Baby
It’s a boy!
All are healthy and happy.
Regards
I should have expected a costumed and well-rehearsed presentation featuring a combination of hospital and professional staff. In fact, retrospectively...
“Actually, Nazy, I should not have been surprised at all.”
“Really?”
“When I saw the live lion on Bath Street by Cottage Hospital, I knew.”
“Dan, you didn’t see...”
“And the T&M Costumes Truck was parked across the street.”
It has, of course, been a week of firsts for Baby Adams. He met his first Aunt (Mitra); she drove from Los Angeles with Stefan to see him. He experienced a first-ever trip to the grocery store. He passed his first checkup with flying colors. There are several milestones ahead:
“For example, it will take a long time before he outweighs the 15 lb. cat.” I explained.
A major question, still unsettled, remains. To wit:
“I want the baby to call me Mamon Joon,” Nazy said.
“Isn’t that what our kids called your mother?” I asked.
“Yes. What do you want the baby to call you?”
“It doesn’t matter right now. The baby can’t talk yet.”
“Would you like to be called Baba Joon?”
“No. I was thinking of having him, and, in fact, everyone, simply call me ‘Shah’.”
“That means ‘King’ in Persian.”
“Precisely.”
“I don’t think that’s a good idea.”
“How about ‘The Grand Dan’?”
“Grand Dan is very close to Grand Dad.”
“I said: The Grand Dan.”
“Isn’t that definite?”
“Yes, ‘the’ is a definite article - and I am definitely The Grand Dan.”
“That’s..”
“Remember that we called your father ‘The Admiral’? This is the same thing.”
“Don’t make any decisions until he can talk, Dan.” Nazy replied.
Modesty Breakdown Alert
Everyone is impressed with my manifestly superior capabilities in the area of baby calming.
“Where did you learn that?” Nazy, amazed, inquired.
“Experience gained from working with large companies,” i replied. “I remember having to ‘burp’ a particularly troublesome customer in Amsterdam,” I thought. “I learned how to comfort agitated and unreasonable human beings.” (I had brought serene tranquility to a crying, eh, bawling, manager during a disappointing sales forecast meeting.)
“The baby, Dan, is calm and unperturbed with everyone. He is not a fussy baby.”
“See! I’m doing my job.”
And, finally, this is the month of astronomical phenomena. New moon last Friday, Summer Solstice (longest day of the year) on Saturday June 21. Santa Barbara is celebrating with a parade. (Santa Barbara likes parades.)
