4:02AM Equinox Drives Chickens (and eggs) to Cyprus
Leaving the house to take my ‘on the road’ driving test, I was also complaining..
“Nothing new there,” Nazy replied.
“It’s not fair. They don’t recognize Swiss driver’s licenses, so I have to take a ‘practical’ test.”
“You’ll do fine..”
“Of course I’ll ‘do fine’ Nazy. That’s not the point.” I replied. “I hope they don’t ask me to parallel park,” I thought. “California hasn’t heard of Switzerland. Europe is a mystery.”
“It’s not a big deal, Dan.” Nazy replied.
Shortly after, I was sitting behind the wheel (in a lonely queue) at the Santa Barbara office of the Division of Motor Vehicles. Eventually, a leviathan-shaped inspector approached my car.
“Call me Ishmael,” she said, introducing herself.
“And I’m Ahab,” I thought.
“...I will not try to trick you. I will not ask you to do anything illegal...” She droned on. “Turn right when you leave the parking lot.”
As I drove a circuitous route through Santa Barbara, I couldn’t help noticing the giant “X” marks she was scratching on her checklist. Back at the DMV, I parked. She looked at me and sighed.
“Take this inside; we’re done here.”
“Done?”
“They will mail your license.”
“Yes!” I thought - like a 15 year-old getting a learner’s permit. “Wait ‘til Nazy hears about this. She’ll be sooo proud of me.” “Thank you.” I said.
Although we’re in a new home, we are determined to maintain essential family traditions. Persian New Year is one such tradition. The annual celebration begins at the exact moment of the vernal equinox. At that time, to assure good fortune in the coming year, the entire family (in this case Nazy and me), leaves the house from the back door and reenters from the front door.
Aside: When living at Prinsvikenpark in The Netherlands, we locked ourselves out of the house when we followed this tradition. I had to hoist Darius into a window to assure ‘good luck’.
This year, 1392 in the (solar) Persian calendar. 2572 in the (royal) Persian calendar and 14-something in the (lunar) Persian calendar began at ..
“Wednesday morning,” I explained. “The exact moment is 4:02AM.”
“AM?” Nazy asked.
“Ja!” I replied Germanically. “Shall I set the alarm?”
“What time is the equinox in Hawaii?”
“7:02AM”
“How about Sydney?”
“9:02AM. Tomorrow.”
“That’s good. Book a flight. Tomorrow.”
“Because of you refuse to get, my dear, we will have bad luck next year.”
“If you wake me up at 4:00AM..”
“....4:02AM!” I interrupted.
“...you will have bad luck today.”
Hoping to avoid a jinxed 1392, (caused by Nazy’s stubborn refusal to get up) I reviewed my internal catalog of ill-timed equinoxes - searching for an anecdote.
“Anecdote?”
...eh, searching for an ‘antidote’ to counteract our looming 4:02 AM miscue. The solution was, I thought, obvious. I explained it to Nazy.
“.. so, instead of the ‘haft-seen’, the traditional table with the seven items representing health and prosperity...
Note: ‘Haft’ is Persian for seven.
“ ... this year we set up a hasht-seen:”
Note: ‘Hasht’ is Persian for eight.
“That’s a dumb solution.” Nazy exclaimed.
“8 items on the celebratory table brings extra luck.”
“I hope my family doesn’t hear about this idea,” Nazy thought - forgetting The Weekly Letter.
The equinox arrived at 11:02 AM in Beirut so Darius was refreshed when he joineour Oxygen Tango business review con-call. But New Year wasn’t on his mind. He was...
“... going to Cyprus for the weekend.”
“Bring money, Dar.” I replied. “The banks and ATM machines are closed. The €uro-zone bailout they need comes with a...”
“... ‘one-time’ government confiscation of money from everyone’s bank account. I know, Dad. That’s why it’s so cheap there. I lived in Iceland when everything collapsed, so I know how to deal with this kind of problem.”
“You’re attracted to economic disaster, Darius.” And “It’s good to see that you’re following in my footsteps.” I thought.
“There is a great Tango teacher in Cyprus,” Mitra interjected.
“I know!” Darius replied. “I hope I can get a lesson.”
“Bring money.” I reiterated.
Later, Nazy and I stopped at the Getty Museum on the way to Los Angeles to see Mitra and Stefan.
We enjoyed the museum (especially the gardens) and had a great dinner and discussion with Mitra and Stefan. Nazy and I (and Darius) are getting more involved with Oxygen Tango, the world’s best Tango School. Mitra and Stefan have created a wonderful environment where people can connect and become part of a caring community.
“But.. you guys are working very hard,” I claimed.
“And you’re stressed,” Nazy added. “You need to hire people to help.”
“We need more income to hire people, Mom.” Mitra noted.
“You need more people to get more income,” Nazy replied.
“I’ve always wondered which came first - like the chicken and egg.” I interrupted.
“Precisely, Dad.”
“Ah ha! So it’s the egg.”
The Getty Museum Azalea Maze