Zoom enables Socially Distant Birthdays
Another ‘shelter at home’ week — this one featuring important birthdays in Santa Barbara (Nazy) and Bellingham, Washington (Auriane). Aware that it would not be possible to go shopping, I tried to convince Nazy to delay her celebration..
“So, my dear,” I explained. “As a result of the COVID-19 crisis, April has been cancelled.”
“Cancelled?”
“That’s right! We’re going to stay in March until the crisis is over. Haven’t you noticed how long that we’ve been living in, well, ‘March’?”
“My birthday is on Wednesday, right?” Nazy concluded, short circuiting the ‘discussion’.
“Of course.” I conceded. Later, I explained my conundrum to Darius..
“I found the perfect birthday card for your Mom, but Amazon said they’d deliver it until…”
“… June, Dad.” Darius interrupted. “Everything is June. I was so excited when I found out that they had restocked toilet paper that I was crushed when the delivery date was June.”
“Oh well,” I replied. “Perhaps they can do a quick shipment of a constipation-creating medication. That way you’ll be able to hold …”
“Stop it, Dad.”
Fortunately, I had bought a birthday cake mix before it became impossible to go to the stores. I got Tiger and Arrow to help me make the cake. Note: In this context, ‘help’ means that they poured the ingredients into the bowl and held the mixer. I did all the other hard work..
“What other ‘hard’ work?” Nazy interjects.
“I preheated the oven,” I mumbled.
“Actually, Dan, you asked me how to turn it on.” Nazy retorted.
“Well the boys only really agreed to lick the spatula and mixing spoons after ..”
“… after you finally agreed to share,” Nazy concluded. Aware that I’d dropped the second layer on the floor the last time I tried to make a cake, I opted for the flat, single layer option that didn’t have to be removed from the cooking pan until it was time to be consumed. The boys, annoyed that we had run out of blue food color, used everything we had to complete the project.
We celebrated Nazy’s birthday in the normal post-apocalyptic manner — a Zoom video conference:
We celebrated Auriane’s very first birthday on the same Zoom call. Auriane surprised her parents by giving them a present: for the first time, she slept through an entire night. When you’re in lockdown with a broken foot, a one year old, a three year old and a Professor who has to teach remotely — well, a baby that sleeps through the entire night is a perfect gift.
The pandemic is so global that it is impacting everyone — except, of course, those who get their ‘news’ from the Fox ‘news’ Fantasyland. The threat is huge and, accordingly, is difficult for any government to handle. Amazingly, our federal government, led by a ‘president’ with an orange play doh encrusted ‘brain’, has the uncanny ability to do almost everything wrong. In the rare times that they do the right thing, they do it halfway and too late.
This situation has also shown that the decades-long total business focus on ‘efficiency’: just-in-time manufacturing, no inventories and global supply chains has very vulnerable downside.
Here in Santa Barbara, we still take walks along the beach and in the local parks. We are careful to maintain distance. Starting this week, face masks are likely to be required. Luckily, at least where we’re walking, people are staying away from each other; Nazy and I are able to enjoy fresh air with the boys.
Take care, wash your hands and stay socially distant
“So, my dear,” I explained. “As a result of the COVID-19 crisis, April has been cancelled.”
“Cancelled?”
“That’s right! We’re going to stay in March until the crisis is over. Haven’t you noticed how long that we’ve been living in, well, ‘March’?”
“My birthday is on Wednesday, right?” Nazy concluded, short circuiting the ‘discussion’.
“Of course.” I conceded. Later, I explained my conundrum to Darius..
“I found the perfect birthday card for your Mom, but Amazon said they’d deliver it until…”
“… June, Dad.” Darius interrupted. “Everything is June. I was so excited when I found out that they had restocked toilet paper that I was crushed when the delivery date was June.”
“Oh well,” I replied. “Perhaps they can do a quick shipment of a constipation-creating medication. That way you’ll be able to hold …”
“Stop it, Dad.”
Fortunately, I had bought a birthday cake mix before it became impossible to go to the stores. I got Tiger and Arrow to help me make the cake. Note: In this context, ‘help’ means that they poured the ingredients into the bowl and held the mixer. I did all the other hard work..
“What other ‘hard’ work?” Nazy interjects.
“I preheated the oven,” I mumbled.
“Actually, Dan, you asked me how to turn it on.” Nazy retorted.
“Well the boys only really agreed to lick the spatula and mixing spoons after ..”
“… after you finally agreed to share,” Nazy concluded. Aware that I’d dropped the second layer on the floor the last time I tried to make a cake, I opted for the flat, single layer option that didn’t have to be removed from the cooking pan until it was time to be consumed. The boys, annoyed that we had run out of blue food color, used everything we had to complete the project.
We celebrated Nazy’s birthday in the normal post-apocalyptic manner — a Zoom video conference:
Although I couldn’t get Instacart to deliver a couple heads of iceberg lettuce and a few Persian cucumbers, I did find a local florist who delivered flowers. I created a birthday card in PowerPoint and I also used a Christmas present that I had prudently safeguarded when it was delivered well after Christmas.
Finally, courtesy of Melika and Tom, we had a (home-delivered) meal (and a great bootle of Cabernet Sauvignon ) from one of our favorite restaurants.
We celebrated Auriane’s very first birthday on the same Zoom call. Auriane surprised her parents by giving them a present: for the first time, she slept through an entire night. When you’re in lockdown with a broken foot, a one year old, a three year old and a Professor who has to teach remotely — well, a baby that sleeps through the entire night is a perfect gift.
The pandemic is so global that it is impacting everyone — except, of course, those who get their ‘news’ from the Fox ‘news’ Fantasyland. The threat is huge and, accordingly, is difficult for any government to handle. Amazingly, our federal government, led by a ‘president’ with an orange play doh encrusted ‘brain’, has the uncanny ability to do almost everything wrong. In the rare times that they do the right thing, they do it halfway and too late.
This situation has also shown that the decades-long total business focus on ‘efficiency’: just-in-time manufacturing, no inventories and global supply chains has very vulnerable downside.
Here in Santa Barbara, we still take walks along the beach and in the local parks. We are careful to maintain distance. Starting this week, face masks are likely to be required. Luckily, at least where we’re walking, people are staying away from each other; Nazy and I are able to enjoy fresh air with the boys.
Take care, wash your hands and stay socially distant
Nazy's birthday Dinner
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