Lost my Head in Krakow
(continued)

“And unlike most women at the time,” the guide continued, “Jadwiga Jagiellon was a hands-on leader. She wore armour and led the army in battle. She was very unusual. Recent studies of her habits show that she consumed 13,000 calories a day – but she was tall, fit and slender.”

“You’re making these stories up,” I thought.

After the tour we delightfully (well, Nazy delightfully) combed the market square [] finding additions to our Polish dishes and flowers for our hotel room. Nazy, also attracted to jewelry shops like a magnet to a refrigerator, examined necklaces made from the national stone:

“Amber is the national stone?” I asked. “Amber? That sounds like one of Melika’s 6th grade classmates.”

“We couldn’t get garnet earrings in Prague, Dan. So..”

“We had garnet growing out of the ledge at our home in New Hampshire,” I replied. “It’s not a precious stone.”

Nazy continued shopping – unaware that the shops would be closed the following day.

Eventually, I convinced her to walk to the rectory where John Paul had lived while he was Bishop of Krakow.

“John Paul,” I noted, “had a way of making people like him even if they disagreed with what he said. He was charismatic. In contrast, the new Pope has no media sense..”

“In fact, he has no sense at all.” Nazy interrupted.

“Precisely! He annoys people with everything he says or does.”

The shops were closed, so we spent Easter Sunday walking through the city, listening to the music, admiring the decorations [] and utilizing the hotel’s fitness center.

The next day we walked to the ‘famous’ Krakow mound. (It is very simply, a man-made hill in a remote part of the city.)

Along the way, I discovered that it is possible to convert any English word to Polish by simply adding a ‘y’.

We also embarked on a two horse-power city tour: the carriage moved faster than our 300+ horsepower car while we were driving the Czech Republic.

Personally, I failed in my attempt to not think about the looming drive home.

“The Internet,” I thought, “recommended a northern route: 400 kilometers through Poland and then a left turn toward Dresden. The total distance we have to cover is vast – similar to the distance between the Polish border and Moscow. And look what that trip did to Napoleon.”

“Napoleon didn’t have a car, Dan.” Nazy interjected.

“I must have been thinking out loud,” I replied. “Germany had tanks when they tried it – and they didn’t make it either.”

“There will be no Russian Winter on way to Switzerland.”

Claudia was no help at all in the initial stages of our drive home. (In fact, she actually said: “Navigation Assistance Unavailable.”) Nevertheless, we found our way to the A4, the motorway in Poland was new, smooth, fast, wide and unpopulated. We had very little trouble until we go into Germany.

“You know, Nazy,” I said. “Every time we have driven through Germany, we’ve gotten caught in a traffic jam on the autobahn.”

“I hate the autobahn, Dan.” Nazy agreed.

Claudia, awake from her Polish slumber, concurred:

“Attention! There are traffic problems on your route.”

She helped us bypass many, but not all, of the traffic problems. When traffic is moving in Germany, it is moving fast – too fast for the autobahn which, unlike the motorway in Poland, is old, bumpy, narrow and crowded.

Our travel problems continued when we (finally) got to Switzerland. The motorway in St. Gallens was under construction. I shouldn’t have been surprised: every motorway in Switzerland is under construction. We arrived home at 11:30PM after a 14 hour drive. It was a great trip and Nazy had a wonderful birthday and, well, I’m sure that I’ll recover from the drive in the next three or four weeks.

See Photos of this trip HERE